Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Why do I keep getting sick?
Is there a reason? I keep trying to be zen about it and "experience the feelings" of being sick, but man, since I've moved to Dallas I have been sick a zillion times. Is it the pollution? The allergies? Am I too busy? I'm supposed to be doing a hot yoga challenge, but I have a sinus infection...and two weeks ago, I had a stomache virus that totally ruined my favorite mexican restaurant! Wow, I'm whiny today. I should delete this.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
something
Write something....Anything!
B is at hot yoga right now, and I've been happily drowning myself in teacher lit. I am determined that this year I will be a kick booty math teacher, and I mean KICKING bootay. You know, even though I went to college for teaching, I thought I'd just do it for two years so I could be a school counselor. Instead, I have found that following my bliss lead me to right where I am, and I love it a surprising amount. Joseph Campbell is right that we must be able to overlook all of our plans for our lives so that we can have the blissful and surprising existence waiting for us. It's so exciting to know that I am not choosing where I go, but kind of feeling where I go. Following my bliss has taken me to much greater places than trying to intellectualize my life goals and trajectory. Anyways, math: I ordered a silly amount of teaching math books from Amazon, and I've been obsessing over them.
Been doing: I have been teaching summer science camp for my district, which is fun!
Been reading: The Tao Te Ching (for the first time...how did I miss this?!), Quantum Wellness, a bunch of teacher stuff
Been listening to: Jack Johnson's new (relatively) stuff
B is at hot yoga right now, and I've been happily drowning myself in teacher lit. I am determined that this year I will be a kick booty math teacher, and I mean KICKING bootay. You know, even though I went to college for teaching, I thought I'd just do it for two years so I could be a school counselor. Instead, I have found that following my bliss lead me to right where I am, and I love it a surprising amount. Joseph Campbell is right that we must be able to overlook all of our plans for our lives so that we can have the blissful and surprising existence waiting for us. It's so exciting to know that I am not choosing where I go, but kind of feeling where I go. Following my bliss has taken me to much greater places than trying to intellectualize my life goals and trajectory. Anyways, math: I ordered a silly amount of teaching math books from Amazon, and I've been obsessing over them.
Been doing: I have been teaching summer science camp for my district, which is fun!
Been reading: The Tao Te Ching (for the first time...how did I miss this?!), Quantum Wellness, a bunch of teacher stuff
Been listening to: Jack Johnson's new (relatively) stuff
Monday, May 26, 2008
maybe
Once upon a time a peasant had a horse. This horse ran away,so the peasant's neighbours came to console him for his bad luck. He answered: "Maybe".
The day after the horse came back, leading 6 wild horses with it. The neighbours came to congratulate him on such good luck. The peasant said: "Maybe".
The day after, his son tried to saddle and ride on one of the wild horses, but he fell down and broke his leg. Once again the neighbours came to share that misfortune. The peasant said: "Maybe".
The day after, soldiers came to conscript the youth of the village, but the peasant's son was not chosen because of his broken leg. When the neighbours came to congratulate, the peasant said again :"Maybe".
(Huai Nan Tzu)
The day after the horse came back, leading 6 wild horses with it. The neighbours came to congratulate him on such good luck. The peasant said: "Maybe".
The day after, his son tried to saddle and ride on one of the wild horses, but he fell down and broke his leg. Once again the neighbours came to share that misfortune. The peasant said: "Maybe".
The day after, soldiers came to conscript the youth of the village, but the peasant's son was not chosen because of his broken leg. When the neighbours came to congratulate, the peasant said again :"Maybe".
(Huai Nan Tzu)
just finished:
Not to be categorized into new phenomenon of dog-lovers books genre. This is MUCH more.
Art. Beautiful. Maybe the best book I have ever loved. This morning, I had no idea it existed; it caught by eye at Starbucks, and I finished it shortly before midnight, teary and vowing to never love another book as much. Intelligence. Brilliance. Beautiful prose. Pages that turn themselves so fast my eyes could barely keep up.
Enzo, the narrator, is a dog/philosopher sure he is soon to be reincarnated as a human. He has an affection for smells, going fast, opposable thumbs and his human best friend, Denny.
"Your car goes where your eyes go." -Enzo
"Give me my thumbs, you ****ing monkeys." -Enzo
Friday, April 25, 2008
little tree at the fancy pants mall...oriental maple?
I admit it, even to my fellow garage sale and thrift store aficionados, I love the fancy pants mall. It is like going to a museum. I love to watch people in beautiful clothes, like moving art installations. I like to smell Chanel and to sift through Anthropologie's plates, fabric and clothes like I'm at the most expensive thrift store in the world. I like to smell everything at the Aveda store, especially the tea. And to try all of the different kinds of teas that speak out to me at the tea shop. I love how fancy pants mall excursions leave me close to Barnes and Noble, Half Price books and sad (for my pant size) to say, the most artful and, holy crap, tasty of cupcakes: Sprinkles.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
you could be my umbrella. ella ella ella hey hey hey
Currently reading: 
Just finished, "In Her Shoes" again. You know, as part of my Jennifer Weiner re-readathon. I only re-read two, but two was enough and they were good, even though I'm not usually into re-reading. Thank god I'm reading more fiction again...Something is wrong when you can no longer bear to settle into fiction. It is as if your mind will not tolerate something that does not result in some sort of "gain," whether it is professional, personal or spiritual. I find that as I've practiced presence more, reading fiction is back (replacing dumb, often regretted internet time) and I'm having fun with it. It makes me sad to think of all of the time I didn't read that kind of book...it's so good for the soul to invest in something that is made-up and just as and transient as the lives we are living right now.
and of course I'm still reading "A New Earth," by Eckhart Tolle.
In his book, Eckhart Tolle says, "The key to understanding 'this to will pass' is knowing that non-resistance, non-judgement and non-attachments are the (keys to) enlightened living. Once you see and accept the transience of all things and the inevitability of change, you can enjoy the pleasures of the world while they last without fear or anxiety about the future."
Love it. I love this book. I love the WAY he quotes Jesus...It feels like that final connection I've been looking for (consciously and unconsciously) to reconcile the Buddhist philosophies that make so much sense to me and have brought me the most peace with the intensity and intimacy of my childhood connection with Christianity. I love reflecting back on verses from the Bible that used to mean so much to me. I haven't known what to do with those for awhile, but they fit in so well with this paradigm of thinking.
I'm grateful for mornings with flickering candles and heavy cups of coffee...open patio doors...relaxing with books and slow, purposeful breathing. I'm grateful to go to work in an inspired setting with inspired people, and to share laughs with kids, to work in small groups at my little kidney bean-shaped table, with my window open behind me, listening to spring's birds, the old-school bowling alley-ish wood floors shining in the sun. It could all end, disappear, turn out to be a fleeting dream, one of a million bubbles on a fast-moving stream. There is nothing I can do to make the impermanent permanent. That used to cause me pain. But it is reality, and accepting it feels better than the mirage of stability.
Just finished, "In Her Shoes" again. You know, as part of my Jennifer Weiner re-readathon. I only re-read two, but two was enough and they were good, even though I'm not usually into re-reading. Thank god I'm reading more fiction again...Something is wrong when you can no longer bear to settle into fiction. It is as if your mind will not tolerate something that does not result in some sort of "gain," whether it is professional, personal or spiritual. I find that as I've practiced presence more, reading fiction is back (replacing dumb, often regretted internet time) and I'm having fun with it. It makes me sad to think of all of the time I didn't read that kind of book...it's so good for the soul to invest in something that is made-up and just as and transient as the lives we are living right now.
and of course I'm still reading "A New Earth," by Eckhart Tolle.
In his book, Eckhart Tolle says, "The key to understanding 'this to will pass' is knowing that non-resistance, non-judgement and non-attachments are the (keys to) enlightened living. Once you see and accept the transience of all things and the inevitability of change, you can enjoy the pleasures of the world while they last without fear or anxiety about the future."
Love it. I love this book. I love the WAY he quotes Jesus...It feels like that final connection I've been looking for (consciously and unconsciously) to reconcile the Buddhist philosophies that make so much sense to me and have brought me the most peace with the intensity and intimacy of my childhood connection with Christianity. I love reflecting back on verses from the Bible that used to mean so much to me. I haven't known what to do with those for awhile, but they fit in so well with this paradigm of thinking.
I'm grateful for mornings with flickering candles and heavy cups of coffee...open patio doors...relaxing with books and slow, purposeful breathing. I'm grateful to go to work in an inspired setting with inspired people, and to share laughs with kids, to work in small groups at my little kidney bean-shaped table, with my window open behind me, listening to spring's birds, the old-school bowling alley-ish wood floors shining in the sun. It could all end, disappear, turn out to be a fleeting dream, one of a million bubbles on a fast-moving stream. There is nothing I can do to make the impermanent permanent. That used to cause me pain. But it is reality, and accepting it feels better than the mirage of stability.
Monday, April 14, 2008
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