Two years ago today, we were here, honeymooning in Costa Rica. Also known as future home. Really. Two years ago yesterday, we barely remember because it went so fast. Ah, weddings. Sometime I'll tell you about how someone started with a toast about how when B met me I swore I would never give in to the social construct of marriage, which is true. Well, true that I said that. Obviously I gave in. And, it has been great. I believe our relationship would have been great marriage or no marriage; however, there is something good and unanticipated that comes with the committment, and I'm not even sure if I can put it into words.
First of all, let's just get something out of the way: B and I danced to Phish's "Waste" for our wedding dance. Not exactly the usual timeless choice, I know. Go ahead and make fun; I'd do it too. Honestly, though, it was fitting. Here are some moments (good and bad) we have happily "wasted" together since we made it official...
...getting married at my favorite place: grandma's pond
...our labrador's debut as a groomsman (although B secretly considers him best man)
...Relaxing in the hot springs of La Fortuna, Costa Rica; relaxing rivers and streams heated by the Arenal Volcano
...Zip lining through the rainforest!
...protesting the war & the state marriage amendment together (which means being flipped off by people with pickup trucks together)
...B joined me in vegetarianism...I did NOT coerce him, promise.
...B making it through the MCAT (and scoring above 90th percentile!!!). We both deserve a high five for making it through this, as he turned into a mad scientist for several weeks. He thought only in math and science, which is not very romantic. Also, I don't believe he showered quite frequently enough.
...moving to Dallas, and spending HOURS and HOURS sitting outside in the terrace, relaxing.
...Spending time with my little bro and B together. My little bro LOVES B and even follows him around in his wheelchair some.
...Making it through my first year teaching
...Becoming members of a hot yoga studio
...Studying family systems together, which has done worlds for our relationship!
...Studying Buddhism together, which has done worlds for our spirits.
When I look back over our past, most of the exciting things we've done were before we got married, like white water rafting and ski trips with best friends...my first trip to New York...camping for two weeks in Austin and San Antonio...canoing, kayaking, rock climbing, etc, etc...but really, just like with friendships, the best times are the little times. With my friends, that has usually meant just hours and hours in coffee houses or at lunch. With B, it's the dinners that we make together, our secret shame of going out to eat, and the ability to sit at a book store for an ungodly number of hours.
And now, we approach a couple more life changes. Next week, B starts medical school. We are both excited and yet a little afraid. It is one of those things in which you pretty much know that you'll be fine, but wonder, "what if?" In a way, we feel like we're saying goodbye for awhile, and it's sad. We're soaking one another up this week; we've decared this week "vacation at home." I know there are bigger problems in the world, but in our little corner (rincon pequeno, you see, my spanish is getting better!), this is the thought of the day. Our relationship has grown leaps and bounds in the past six months, even, and I think we've come to both appreciate how blessed we feel to share something so special. It is not all scary; I've got plenty to keep me busy. I'll have a new job (more on that later, still teaching! It's good news.), and am working on my master's (I got in to the Master's of Social Work program, yeah). I'm going to visit a best friend in New Jersey in a couple of weeks...and, I keep saying I'll get more involved with local politics/activism. I've already found a local organization I love (see Central Dallas Ministries link!); I just need to get started. Maybe I can finally show Barack how much I love him, too. B and I have lots of ideas for how we'll safeguard our relationship during the next eight (yes, eight!) years of craziness. We know we'll be okay, but we also know we'll miss eachother.
This moment (below) is important to me for other reasons. Although I was not your typical bride and honestly felt a little coerced (although I did end up having the best day!) into the whole traditional wedding thing by my VERY excited mother (and believe it or not, my husband, who later changed his mind and tried to go back in time to elope), I did have a little wedding stressor, which was that the tent guy forgot the sides to the little tent. This is actually sort of an important tent, b/c it's where you're supposed to hang out with your wedding party until you walk down the isle. My girlfriends/bridesmaids and a couple of special cousins actually constructed some sides out of tulle and clothes pins. Then, they surprised me with mimosas (I had mentioned in passing I could use one- like I said, not a good bride. Then, they went around a circle making individual toasts. I get goose bumps thinking about it... I make AMAZING friends. Amazing.
And I know you're dying for the lyrics to Waste...
Dont want to be an actor pretending on the stage
Dont want to be a writer with my thoughts out on the page
Dont want to be a painter cause everyone comes to look
Dont want to be anything where my lifes an open book
A dream its true
But Id see it through
If I could be
Wasting my time with you
Dont want to be a farmer working in the sun
Dont want to be an outlaw always on the run
Dont want to be a climber reaching for the top
Dont want to be anything where I dont know when to stop
A dream its true
But Id see it through
If I could be
Wasting my time with you
So if Im inside your head
Dont believe what you might have read
Youll see what I might have said
To hear it
Come waste your time with me
Come waste your time with me
So if Im inside your head
Dont believe what you might have read
Youll see what I might have said
To hear it
Come waste your time with me
