"Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray." ~Rumi

juicy

I looove Jennifer Weiner's books.  If I didn't already enjoy that they are easy reads about unconventional women, I'd read them for the decadent food descriptions.  Hands down, I'm a foodie.  Meal chronicles such as, "garlic and white-bean puree with truffle oil" tap into my best foodie instincts, and I'm ready to savour some words.  

Literature + bubble bath = ooh.  But how about some juice with that?  Carrot juice with apple.  Thank you Super Angel (pretty, pretty princess) juicer!  Yesterday was my biggest juicing day yet with five whole juices, four of which were green.  

And did I mention I'm caffeine free for something like seven days?  I have recently heard caffeine dependency described as living off of credit: If you don't pay it back, your account suffers because you are essentially living off of a facade.  Er, I think I get it.  I may not even be a person who can have an occasional caffeine drink; it's indelibly easy for me to slip into the routine of using it to elevate my energy so I can do more.  Do more!  Do more!  For example, right now I feel a little tired.  In (seven) days gone by, this means I'd get some coffee, a whole jittery pot; since I'm not running to pour a cup, I have some foresight and think about the fact I slept 6 hours last night instead of 7 or 8.  I need a nap, not a coffee.  Naps are sustainable (yes they are); coffee is not sustainable in that capacity. Right.  I don’t want it anyways.  Yes I do.  No I don’t.

Let's talk about all of the nutrition I had yesterday!  Juice, man.  I meant it when I said I was done with this sickness crap- and then with B’s mom and my mom both getting lymphoma in the same breath- it’s to much.  So, my answer, or part of it:  juice.  Four green’s yesterday, and one carrot.  That's about an entire head of romaine lettuce- those are huge!  Also, a green pepper, three whole organic carrots and one green apple.  And that's just for my juice!  I ate food, too.  And since I’m trying to shrink my arse, now that I know that every extra pound of fat is extra hormones your body has to regulate, I made sure to stay in my little calorie range.  Iphones have a good app for this, called “Lose It.”  

Where is she getting all of this energy, you ask?   Something that's making an heavy impact is that B and I went to Austin to learn Transcendental Meditation.  I had been considering it for a year or so, and once Bruce learned about all of the studies on TM, he wanted in too.  I'm finding my meditation has improved HUGELY.  I mean, I cannot even tell you how much better it is- life changing better.  My perspective has just shifted in these past seven days that I’ve been practicing...I have more of a sense of the commonality we share.  That's right, you and me.  We are s to the ame.*

*I’m willing to hold nerdy white girl gangsta talk coaching sessions, but they are e to the xtra. 

" It is our enemies who provide us with the challenge we need to develop the qualities of tolerance, patience and compassion." ~ The Dalai Lama

Not that I have any particular enemy experiences going on right now- I like this.  If we redefine the word "enemy," then I might love this.

my first green juice

We decided on the Angel Juicer, mostly because many reported greater ease of cleaning than the Greenstar juicer.  We love it, and have been juicing a carrot/apple combination every day.  Today, I made my first green juice.  I'm trying out the juices from the Gerson Therapy.

For my first green juice, I didn't want to be complicated, so I went with romaine and quarter of a green pepper.  The vertical spout is where the veggies go in.  One plastic container holds the pulp, and one holds the juice.  

I was afraid it might taste bitter, but it didn't!  It actually tastes like sweetish, lettucy water.  Refreshing.

Here is the leftover fiber.  The rationale behind leaving behind the fiber in juicing is that your body can take in far more nutrients than it would otherwise be able to digest.  I'm one of those people who gets very tired after eating, so I find this extra appealing to give my digestion a break.

Clean up:  About 3 minutes!  I didn't even need to use the special brush that came with the juicer.  Just a hot rinse, + it's shiny new.

Conclusion: Angel juicer gets 4 out of 5 juice glasses.  One goes missing for expense + because it is less versatile than the Greenstar.  The super easy clean up + pretty princess design means I'd choose it again!  

Ghetto Disclaimer:  Our tile grout is permanently this color!  I know. Yes, I've tried the paint stuff, but I'm open to your ideas.   At any rate, this is how our counters always look-- we can be ghetto, but no one wants to look more ghetto than they actually are!

Preston likes it here

Preston loves the range, mostly because there is a pond and he is able to most efficiently smell of fish.  Sam and Moses like it too, but they can't be trusted off leash.

My mom is recovering from a hysterectomy + removal of the tumor-- rumor is she looked 6 or 7 months pregnant!  She says she never expected to be pregnant at 49, but she might actually take the baby over the tumor.  

Anyways, her biopsy results came back; it looks like she has non-hodgkin's lymphoma.  This is very strange to B and I because B's mom was only diagnosed with NHL a few months ago.  Of course, she's doing really well at the moment!  My mom had a bone marrow biopsy today-- but we won't hear back for awhile.  It has occurred to me that I should get over my fear of bone marrow biopsies, should I need to look into sharing some marrow...not sure how that all works.

No one wants any cancer, but I think lymphoma is probably relieving to my mom compared to the ovarian cancer we thought it was.  For awhile, there was talk of the situation as being very, very dire with very few options.  Since then, it's been roller coastery, but overall better.  

My mom is in super good spirits.  She's kind of a badass.

home on the range

I am home on the range.  This is my grandma's house, where I was mostly raised--my mom and I lived on in a little trailer on my grandma's land.  I didn't know it at the time, but it was pretty idyllic, so Bruce and I decided to get married here, and that was pretty special.  Post outside the garden that I remember my great grandpa tending when I was little.  I took the picture because I think that' s a squirrel tail hanging off of it; not sure what that's about.

Flowers in my mom's front yard.

I remember lots about this garden!  It used to be even bigger than this.  I would take the tomatoes into my wagon and sell them door to door.  My grandma would take me to pick okra for pickled okra and to dig up potatoes for the potato cellar.  She would take me to her precious strawberry patch, then to pick apples off the trees for apple pie.

Baby grapes.  I remember these, too.

Cherries Bruce bought.  They did not last long.  My mom is still at the hospital.  One dr says her tumor is not operable.  Another says it is.  She's being quite brave.  I have an appointment with an endo I've been waiting on for awhile, who had a cancellation.  The funny thing is, I feel like I'm sort of giving up on waiting for medicine to make me feel better.  I have an intuition that my real healing/relief will come with better health and emotion balance....so it's going to be easy for me to gain weight now?  Maybe that just means I need even more whole foods, even less processed foods, even more rest, even less drama. :)

strange birds + five clams

Sam + I went on a walk yesterday.  We came upon some birds...the heck?

What are these birds?  The brown ones were kind of metallic-purple on their faces.  They were just barely larger than common doves, walked liked chickens, shook their feathers like peacocks.  They did not seem to mind my little dog + I.  

Breakfast.  Pretty much what I have every day, but it used to have eggs.  

Haven't been feeling eggs for awhile.

Mom Update: My mom's in the hospital getting tests + blood.  It might be a few days before we know anything.  I'm sending lots of peace and healing to her!

Have you watched this?  

www.foodmatters.tv

Totally worth the five clams.  There are some free ones on there, too. 

Healthy Eating: Something about all of this health drama, all over the place, all at once, has made anything remotely processed just look terrible.  I'm generally pretty healthy anyways, although I think someone should tell my a$$ that, because it's just not shrinking.  It's beena little  awhile since I've had anything other than vegetable or fruit--I haven't had gluten, sugar or any sort of animal product (although once I'm healthy, I'd like to have fish again, I imagine). Whatever it takes at this point!  I'm still waiting on my juicer.  Woo hoo.