Thursday, January 08, 2009

ostriches, suze orman + the virgin mary



Ah, budgets. Schmudgets. We like to take the ostrich approach. What, we have no money? Again? Wha happened?

The ginormity of B's med school debt gives money that fuzzy, abstract feeling to us. If our budget were a modern art gallery, B and I might be standing in front of any given piece scratching our heads. "Yes, I think it's a dollar. No, maybe a goat? Do you see the likeness of Virgin Mary? Yeah, there's the nose, and, eh, maybe a goat? I don't know, let's go out to eat."

I don't think Suze Orman would look puzzled at our budget museum, but there would be a look. I would not let her in there, you know: I have the fear. She's on Oprah today. Reppin' the Oprah groupies, I've been checking in on her Best Life 2009 challenge thingy. Today was about finances; financial badyouknowwhat Suze said, well, a lot of things. An eight-month emergency fund, she says. Talk about overwhelming. Has she gotten tougher? Eight months of expenses? EIGHT?! What happened to three?

Recession, yo: That's a little abstract to me, too. Anyone else secretly wondering, "So how bad does it get? And what does that look like? What about people like me who think a portfolio is a place where you keep your pretty pictures? Should I be bracing myself, or is this more of a stocks and employment thing? Will this be like the depression, and what was the depression really like? How do you know when your'e in or out of one?" Man, I almost went into ostrich mode just reading this stuff online. Make it go away. After I finished breathing in an out of a paper bag, I got to thinking about her much less overwhelming baby-step challenge:

For just one day, do not spend any money on anything.
For just one week, do not use a credit card.
For just one month, do not eat out at a restaurant.

Hmph. I think I could do the first two okay, but man, I love me some eating out. Mmm, I'm thinking of spinach crepes right now from Cafe Brazil. With rosemary potatoes. And tabasco. Or, the sour creamy cheesy potatoes like my grandma makes at Thanksgiving. Oooh, or Bolsa's Twig and Branch pizza with a glass of cabernet, ah. A month?! We'll see. Clearly, I'm not committed yet.

Twitter Update: I don't get it. I just don't. What IS it?!